Date Night can take your relationship to a more intense level.

Date Night Matters

So it’s date night. Or date day. We started date night accidentally right at the beginning of our partnership. We had known each other for years so were well aware of where we wanted to take the sexual side of our relationship. The chemistry between us and general compatibility were very high and so we were both inspired to take the sex, and consequently the relationship as a whole, to a more intense level. Date night grew out of this desire.

With this in mind, on one of the first occasions we got to spend time together alone, he had set up a whole scenario which involved cable ties, ropes, whips and other such paraphernalia. After the course of events had been taken through to its natural conclusion we were exhilarated and excited about what we had achieved. (Read about it here). We were also somewhat exhausted mentally and physically. We were always going to have a lot of sex, but knew these special nights would have to be limited to keep them that way. I have children who are just starting to make their way in the world – I’m not in the throes of youth anymore, and neither is he.

Giving Your Time Matters

Life can be busy but we value each other and our relationship highly enough to make the time and effort to indulge the sexual pleasures we enjoy. We never fail to feel closer after a date night and may savour that time by talking about what went on for days. The evenings are generally more distinctive than the date-days as added time and effort are put into them.

Once we have set aside a night – usually about every 3/4 weeks – I start to plan my makeup and what I am going to wear. This will depend on whether we are meeting out or staying in. Often he will tell me put e how he wishes me to dress. I enjoy adorning myself just for him more than if I was going out to a bar or restaurant to socialise.  This is reflected in the great deal of effort I put into my appearance – right down to plucking eyebrows and painting nails. I am not a plastic woman and am indeed fortunate for my age to have excellent breasts, very good skin and lips, good hands and nails and long legs.  I would never dream of subjecting my body to false boobs, nails or hair. Indeed if I did my man would run a mile!

Date nights make me feel valued and appreciated. He always makes the effort to cook an excellent meal and plans the setting and the equipment to be used. He indulges me with compliments and champagne. Date days can be even more exciting as they are often spontaneous and the experience can be far more urgent and explicit. These encounters reaffirm in my mind why we are together. For him I submit because in my mind he deserves me to.

Date Night can go wrong

What happens when a date night goes wrong – or not as you had anticipated? It can happen. It is quite possible for a situation to escalate way out of control and an evening to end in tears and emotional confusion, instead of the more desired scenario.

The evening began as always with agreeable chat, good food and champagne. I wore heavy makeup, killer heels, holdups, see thru black lace top, black gloves, black lacy knickers and body jewellery.  We moved into the living area with our champagne where he had dotted the room with numerous candles. He had pre-prepared the setting. Ropes hung from the beam and a handmade whip and a horse whip lay on one of the chairs. The scene was set and my pulse began to race.

My man sat in the arm chair and asked me to stand across the room by the fireplace. He sat drinking his champagne and staring at me. We exchanged carnal banter and I became even more energised, anticipating what was about to happen. He asked me remove my top and approved of the waist jewellery and necklaces that adorned my naked body.

The date night is beginning.

He leads me over to where the ropes are hanging from the main beam crossing the room. I raise my hands above my head and he ties a wrist to each rope, really stretching my body taut. He removes my knickers and with his knee pushes my legs apart so I am standing in a sort of star shape wearing just my shoes, holdups and body jewellery. I look at him and ask him to whip me. It comes out in a whisper as my breathing quickens.

The first few lashes land on my arse and feel painful.  He takes up the horse whip and flogs my back again and again in quick succession. He stops and looks at me. I know he is waiting for me to ask for more. We discussed the likely events of date night the previous day. He had requested that I be a good girl and ask for my beatings. I turn my head sideways, look him in the eyes and courteously invite him to thrash me some more. Without hesitation the horse whip makes heavy contact with my arse – repeatedly. The pain is excruciating, perhaps the worst I have experienced. My brain takes control and “zones out” so I don’t feel the full intensity of it.

Suddenly he is in front of me, gently kissing me, telling me how good I have been. I feel electric and full of desire and appreciation for my man. The evening is shaping up as a date night to remember! He unties my wrists and pulls me to the floor. Spreading my legs, he begins to slowly lick me. On this occasion my senses are far too magnified for me to reach orgasm. I sit up and he briefly thrusts his cock in my mouth before removing it and instead of face fucking me he refills our glasses with more champagne. He sits in the arm chair and I kneel with my drink in front of him. He tells me how beautiful I am and in what way the jewellery makes me appear even more naked and exposed.

Change of  Mood

On my part it is at this point that I should have interpreted his change of temperament. I should have  realised we needed to unwind from the stimulating proceedings and perhaps switch to cuddling on the sofa. However, as previously mentioned we had discussed possible activities that we may incorporate into the date night and I wanted more.

He had other ideas: Stop: Talk: Contemplate: Wanted compassion: Ah, what now?

I was far too elevated to respond in a thoughtful manner to the pressing topic he wished to talk about that had been on his mind. On his part I felt it was certainly the wrong moment to bring into play a sombre concern.

I then behaved badly. I didn’t consider that for him to raise the issue at this time it must have been important. Instead I felt discarded, hurt and let down. I do not take drugs but I think it could be likened to coming down from an extreme high at a very fast speed.

He felt- understandably- that I was not behaving in the caring, supportive manner that the topic he had raised required. I wasn’t.  At that moment I was not the woman that I attempt to be on a day to day basis – the one that cares about him deeply,  his partner and best friend. Instead I was his dirty slut who in frustration could only think she still wanted more from her date night.

After tears, confusion, raised voices and emotional justifications we finally saw each other’s point of view. As a couple we generally communicate extremely well, and that is particularly vital in a relationship like ours. We agreed that we will have to strive to extend this connection, if need be, to discuss things openly even during a date night. We ended an extremely mentally and physically exhausting evening in bed with our bodies lovingly entwined.

date night
Sexual Expression

Read here about a date day that was anything but wrong!