Gender Dysphoria – For the Love of Our Children
When I was ten I began to read widely. Anything to take me away from everyday life, even if only into my head. I devoured books that offered a reality unlike my own. The Tarzan series by Edgar Rice Burroughs was a favourite. I was taken with the backdrop and the characters. I fell in love with the books but I did not fall in love with Tarzan. No, I wanted to be Tarzan. Jane was OK but that sissy life was not for me! I had a ripe imagination and began to play-act being just like him in the woods with whatever friends I could persuade to join me.
At home I immersed into a world inside my head and became him. I told mum about the new development. Researched all I could about Tarzan and the life he would have led if he was real. Luckily my mother was a slightly absent minded sort and would have replied with something like:
“that’s nice dear”, smiling down at me.
My brother called me a freak, beat me up and said,
“see, you’re just a silly girl.”
I was not swayed by either and the Tarzan scenario continued for some time. It emerged in my schoolwork and I was moved up to the top set for having a vivid imagination and excellent creative writing skills.
Nowhere during this quite lengthy and involved phase in my childhood did anyone suggest I had such a thing as gender dysphoria. Nobody at home or school suggested I needed to see a doctor or counsellor. Those were the days when we were encouraged to have imaginations, thinking skills and left alone to simply be a child. Which was Just as well as within two years I had developed a huge crush on my brother’s friend. I spent much time making sure I had a dress on when he was at our house and wiggling my newly developing figure to try and attract his attention. I didn’t want to be Tarzan anymore, I wanted to be Marc’s girlfriend. For the next year, I put nearly as much effort into the new fantasy as I had into the old.
Years later, as a mother to my first child I fondly looked back on my Tarzan stage. She had a friend during her early years of primary school called Elliot. He adored dressing up with her and other little girls in their princess outfits. My daughter wasn’t at all fazed. She always made sure the outfit he liked best was available if he was round for his tea. Often his Mum would pick him up and -because it was easier- left with him still in the dress. I enjoyed my daughter’s friendship with Elliot. She had a bright imagination and needed friends who could match her desire for creative play. He did. His mother never displayed any concern over his clothing preference. The years passed by and our families lost contact. Then not too long ago my daughter was at a club. She returned excited to have seen Elliot there.
“How is he?” I inquired, “still wearing nicer dresses than you?”
“Not quite,” she replied. “I found him with his face attached to Chloe’s- she’s his girlfriend.”
I was not at all surprised. Elliot had been left alone to be a child, just as I had. He grew out of his dress phase and grew into what he would always have become, without intervention. Of course, it is possible that he may have reached eighteen and decided he really wanted to be a girl. As an adult he could have then sought the necessary advice. But he didn’t, just as I hadn’t.
When boys insist they are really girls and girls insist they are really boys, an honest parent or teacher would consider a range of possibilities to determine what’s really happening. Deciding that a child “really is” the opposite sex shouldn’t even be on the list of options, let alone condemning him/her to a complicated, difficult life under permanent medical scrutiny. In my opinion that is comparable to child abuse.
For the love of all Elliots out there - leave the kids alone!
If you are a parent or guardian of a child or teenager this issue should worry you, as it has me. It seems to be increasingly common that Munchausen-type parents and politically correct teachers feel it is OK in society now to steer adolescents and young adults down the transgender path. Naive young people who are merely exploring their personalities and learning about the world are being catapulted into a weird reality...
For most young people who have feelings of apparent gender dysphoria, the experience is in fact temporary. An overview of the relevant research says:
Over the past six years there has been a 930% increase in the number of children referred to NHS gender clinics across the UK, including one three-year-old and three four-year-olds since April last year. Let me say that again a 930% increase!
Here are some clips from the BBC report
shows that the total number of 94 children referred in 2009-10 has increased to 969 in 2015-16.
a five-year-old Nottinghamshire boy has just returned to the classroom ‘as a girl’ with support from the school. They sent out letters to parents and children explaining the change. The liberal reaction of the adults around this case, as reported in the Nottingham Post, provides an insight into the reason why the number of children referred to gender clinics has increased so dramatically over the last six years.
Colin Pettigrew, the local council authority’s director for children, families and cultural services, said: “Transgender is a characteristic protected by law and therefore head teachers across England continue to, and are required to, agree a clear plan to support the needs of transgender, gender dysphoria, children and young people.”
I found this shocking. We cannot categorically predict that a child will be gay or lesbian. We also cannot know if a child will grow up to be transgender, but this is far less likely. The only protected characteristic we should insist on for children is ‘childhood.’
So called gender dysphoria at age three, would apply to a large number of little children who like dressing up and playing with toys which are arbitrarily designated for the opposite sex. We are told that it’s up to a child to decide whether they are a boy or a girl; told the ‘correct’ response is to do everything the child wants so to create a ‘very happy’ child, and warned that if we respond in the wrong way we will create a ‘real problem’ for the child. We must ‘talk about it’ rather than just allow the child to get on with exploring and discovering the world without being labelled. We are told that we should not ignore it because ‘it won’t go away’ when the overwhelming likelihood is that it will.
So, who is telling us how to behave with our own children? The Gender Identity Research and Education Society (GIRES). Their stated belief is that schools and local authorities have a big part to play in supporting those that are ‘going through the process’ and, to help them, they actually provide lesson plans to teach young children about transitioning.
What about lessons in thinking for themselves, and letting the children do what they have done well for centuries – play? Play at being the opposite sex. Play at being animals in the jungle. Or at being mummies and daddies. Play at doctors and nurses. If a child starts acting like a tiger in a zoo are we to discuss with them the prospect of them becoming a large cat? Will we send letters home to the other parents letting them know that Ben now needs to be referred to as “tigger”? I don’t think so. If your child is in such a school where classes in transitioning are taught my advice would be to remove your them as fast as you can.
A child does not passively ‘go through the process;’ - affirming a child as the opposite sex and ensuring that everyone treats the child as such is the adults’ decision, not the child’s. Waiting until a child has reached intellectual maturity before making these sorts of decisions would make more sense. But this is an unpopular attitude, and professionals who support it are criticised. Not because science disproves it, but because it has now been regarded as insensitive. At odds with the current ideology and trend. The (GIRES) have stated that one of their key concerns is the indiscriminate requirement that all young people must be at least 16 years old before being offered “gender affirming medication”. However, in some other countries, not the UK, children younger than 16 can be administered some type of hormone therapy. For goodness sake, you wouldn’t treat your dog in such a way.
I tend to approach the world with a “live and let live” perspective. I do not mind what a person’s opinions are or how they may view their sexuality or indeed their identity in life – if they are an adult and not harming anyone else. What really annoys me is when innocent, inventive children are being overly influenced by adults who do not have their best interests at heart. There is another agenda at play as far as these adults are concerned. It does not include letting the children play. Putting children under such scrutiny inhibits them from becoming the individuals that society needs.
Checkout the GIRES