7 reasons why men should give femdom a try

Here’s a super guest post about femdom from the guys at Lust Nerd – What a great name! Find out more about them at the end of the article.

Nowadays kinks are becoming more and more popular, with femdom not being an exception. For those who haven’t heard of this kink — femdom stands for female domination and involves a female dominating a submissive partner. Often misunderstood is that femdom isn’t exclusive to the sexual act and quite often doesn’t include sex at all.

For centuries, society has viewed submissive men as weak and unmanly. On the other hand, society believes submission for women is natural. Despite common societal beliefs, a study from 2015 showed that 10% of men exclusively like to be submissive, while 32% are switchers — enjoying both, submission and domination.

Quite often I hear men say: “I can’t think of any reason why I should try female domination”. This article will give you seven reasons why you should at least give this kink some consideration.

Reasons #1: Releasing stress by giving up control

Many people have stressful jobs and a lot of responsibilities during their everyday life. Responsibilities might range from managing a team, handling risks for the company, or taking care of your children. A great way to deal with stress and constant responsibility is to give up complete control for a short period of time, such as during a femdom scene.

Professional dominatrixes report that a large portion of their clients are very successful people with a lot of responsibilities that want to give up control by submitting to their mistress.

Reason #2: Satisfying human needs

Every human being has human needs. Two of those can be fulfilled by submitting to a partner of choice.

One human need I am talking about is uncertainty. Although a femdom scene is negotiated beforehand — meaning the limits and desires of both partners are discussed and agreed upon — the submitting partner does not know the exact course of the play. For example, a blindfolded submissive might be uncertain of when, where, and how hard their mistress will hit/ flog or cane them.

Another human need fulfilled by femdom is contribution. Besides punishment, femdom might include worshipping their mistress or pleasuring them according to their needs. Seeing their Mistress happy or satisfied creates a feeling of having contributed to their pleasure and desires.

Reason #3: Feeling of safety

To many, this might sound contradictory. How can being humiliated, punished, or degraded create a feeling of safety? While in life at any moment in time something might go wrong, a femdom play has strict rules and limits. Before engaging in this act both partners come together and talk about their limits and what turns them on during sex. This is done to avoid situations in which one of the partners might be uncomfortable. Thus, during the femdom scenario, the submissive does not have to fear being uncomfortable, which in turn creates a feeling of safety.

When engaging in femdom repeatedly with the same mistress a strong connection and trust are created, further increasing the feeling of safety.

Letting go of one of the strongest insecurities men have — being the submissive partner — can be incredibly freeing and is only possible when having a strong trust and feeling of safety towards their mistress.

Reason #4: Pleasure

To some people, acts like humiliation, bondage, or impact play feel incredibly pleasurable. For example, spanking can be done in a way that it feels pleasurable to submit to a partner. But how come? Before spanking your submissive rub and massage their butt gently, to increase the blood flow. Then gently start spanking them, while slowly increasing the force. This way the pain will feel more pleasurable. Additionally, when spanking the meaty part of the butt the prostate or clitoris might get stimulated.

Reason #5: Fulfilling your partner’s desires

This one definitely does not apply to those for whom submission is a hard limit. If you have read this article and still believe femdom is absolutely nothing for you that’s ok, everybody has hard limits their partner should accept. But still, I ask you to think about femdom with an open mind.

But to those who get turned on by fulfilling their partner’s desires, this might be a great way to bring them pleasure.

Reason #6: Trying something new, because why not?

I bet there have been sexual acts where you just thought – “F*ck it, let’s try it”. Maybe someone recommended roleplay to you and you gave it a shot, not knowing if you would enjoy it. One reason why you tried it might be because nothing really spoke against it.

On the contrary, one reason why you have not tried femdom might be the societal stigma, that only weak men submit. I disagree with this and believe that acknowledging your insecurities and ignoring societal stigma indicates a truly confident and adult man.

Many couples start trying out new things once their sex life gets dull. This might be three years into the relationship or 30. Imagine not trying a certain act and 30 years later finding out that you absolutely love it. Chances are high you will regret not having tried it earlier.

Reason #7: Sexy clothing

Let’s imagine you have tried femdom but neither like nor really dislike it. Your partner on the other hand freaking loves it. There might be a great way to compromise with your partner. Agree on a light femdom scenario and have her wear a sexy latex dominatrix costume or lingerie. While she will feel even more in character you can enjoy the incredibly hot latex costume, adding to both of your pleasures.

A couple of ways to assert domination

· Humiliation: This could be verbally or by making him do humiliating tasks.

· Worship women: Make him worship you verbally or please you sexually.

· Have men dress as women: He has to ditch his clothes for women’s underwear or clothing.

· Impact play: Spank/ flog or cane him.

· Bondage: Tie him to the bed or a chair.

· Orgasm control: Just before he is about to come, stop and wait. Repeat this a couple of times and have him beg for release.

How to start with this fetish

In case you are single and would like to dip your toes into this kink, visiting a professional dominatrix definitely is an option. They know exactly what they are doing and will be able to adjust to your beginner level.

For those who are uncertain if this really is something you might find pleasurable, I encourage you to try roleplay. Chose a femdom roleplay scenario you both find hot. This will give your female domination a purpose with a scene.

Given you are confident you want to submit to your partner, you could act as your partner’s sex slave. Your Mistress will assert dominance through the above-mentioned ways taking away your control of the situation.

Conclusion

There are a few reasons why people like to submit during sex. Your main takeaway should be that submission is not only for women to explore but for every gender. Perhaps by exploring femdom you discover a different kink that appeals to you — bondage, impact play, the list goes on and on …

Written and sponsored by Lust Nerd. They have a dedicated blog to help kinksters find the best role playing outfits and accessories. Their main goal is to educate and guide people to making the best purchase decisions.