Faking it – the when, why and how

Faking orgasms. There’s a funny thing. Would someone like me, who writes candidly and believes in truth and freedom, be as dishonest as to fake an orgasm? And what would lead me to pursue such a double dealing act?

Well let’s start at the beginning…

In the beginning

By the time I first started having PIV sex I was no stranger to enjoying mind bending, body tingling orgasms. I’d been masturbating since I was thirteen or fourteen. So being fucked simply became another way for me to get this addictive fix.

Jim was was the first to be given that  job. And certainly didn’t disappoint. His cock was over-sized, although I didn’t realise this until I moved on to other cocks. Jim was up for anything. Always ready to rock n roll or should I say cock n roll 😉 It was easy to rely on him to hold back until I climaxed. Often, before meeting me of an evening he had a wank. And even when he did reach the finish line first, within a short time he was ready for another shot at the target. Yeah, youth.

Then, there was Vic. Having  been best friends since we were fourteen it was easy to slot quickly into quite an exciting sex life. So, by the time I started my ill-fated relationship with Seb I had become a bit of a premature-ejaculater – I orgasmed quickly during any sexy action – although obviously I didn’t have a load to ejaculate but have been known to squirt now and then.

There were a few other comings and goings with guys, shorter relationships but I never had any problems taking my own pleasure from the sex. Indeed, at this point in time I can’t remember ever having faked an orgasm, Being young, with all its merits, meant tiredness and stress never wore me down enough to even consider such a thing.

But then the sex resulted in procreation and over the next few years I gave birth to two children.

Getting older

Things changed. Though I don’t believe this has to be the case but circumstance found me masturbating regularly rather than having any sexual interaction with another person for quite a few years.

When I got together with Mr A I was in the throws of motherhood with all its trappings. After a while his incessant need for intercourse, along with an extreme amount of tension from life’s trials and tribulations, wore me down.

I don’t remember the first time it happened but I do remember thinking to myself – I’m tired, I wish he would simply get on with it and cum then we can both get some rest. So, intentionally I let out a few oohs, ahhhs and added a little thrust of the hips and shudder of my body.

Ta-dah!

I was faking it. Mr A let him self off the hook, climaxed and we both rolled over and slept.

Once faked it’s easy to repeat. And my relationship with Mr A lasted well past it’s sale by date. In the end I could hardly bare to lay next to him at night – resulting in me feeling crap about sex anyhow. I will admit now and then my body just couldn’t help itself. On these occasions I would climax as quickly as possible. But if the urge was no where in sight, I called in my newly found acting skills and well, Bobs your uncle.

My man and me

After Mr A,  my man and I became an item. We had a dalliance shortly before I had my kids and I’d never really forgotten the strength of the attraction between us. When we finally got together my body felt like it was in a constant aroused state. I adored any naked time we had together – heart, body and soul. However, on a couple of occasions in the early days, I was so wound up with anticipation, expectation, want, you name it – way more than I had ever experienced before – that I just could not come. What to do? Wanting him to feel good about us and what we did I faked it. A little ooh here, ahhh there, a booty wriggle and I was pretending to climax for the pair of us.

I can honestly say this has only happened on a few occasions. As we got closer I learned to say,

“nah, its not going to happen tonight.”

Which is how is should be. Although, I must add – I want him to come – more than I want me to come. A while ago GotN wrote a fab article about this. I very much related to her words except I would rather my man jacked his load on to me, not in me – but that is simply a personal preference. The main thing is – that he comes.

No More Faking it for May

Reasons to be cheerful

There it is – In the past I have faked my orgasm – but for quite valid reasons, in my opinion:

  • I wanted to get the act over and done with.
  • I felt too hyped and didn’t want to hurt my lovers feelings.

I’m done with faking it. No need to now.  Also, in my opinion it’s not necessary to climax to have a really sexy, enjoyable time. Some of my favourite moments with my man include those when I haven’t orgasmed. But I prefer it when he does – I want him to come. Did I already mention that?

Faking it #122
#271

21 thoughts on “Faking it – the when, why and how”

  1. I used to fake every single orgasm I ever “had” — until my divorce. Then I decided I would never do it again, and I don’t. But like you, I’m in a relationship where I also know I can say, “It’s not happening tonight” or “I want you to come even if I don’t.” There’s so much freedom in learning you don’t have to have an orgasm OR fake one.

  2. The times I have faked it have exactly been for the reasons you mentioned. And just like you, it is way more important to me that he comes, not that I do. Interesting that many of us feel the same about this.

  3. I loved the humorous way that you wrote this. It is a serious topic but you meant that it wasn’t heavy at all. I really enjoyed this 🙂

  4. Your experiences are pretty similar to mine. Especially the Mr A ones. I love it when G comes, but that doesn’t always happen for us either – age is the thing for us now. Great post May

  5. I’ve faked it in the past, for those same reasons. Now I’m getting much better at just saying, “my body isn’t going to cum on this occasion, but that’s okay.” Sex is about more than the big O. ??

  6. I have faked it as well for exactly those reasons. But I, too, now tell my husband when it’s just not going to happen. Doesn’t mean the sex isn’t great and I don’t enjoy the intimacy. And yes: I just love it when he comes.

  7. I find this prompt fascinating. I have nothing of personal relevance to post about on it but the perspectives from the female point of view and why fake orgasms is enlightening. Lovely read. ?

  8. I admit I fake it from time to time. Sometimes it’s just not going to happen and if I don’t he is likely to not want to “give up”, whereas I’m ready to call it quits. I struggle with my sex drive, and sometimes I’m just not that into it. I’m working on it though. Sex blogging is starting to help my libido.

  9. Faking it. There was a whole Seinfeld episode about this The Mango, I believe. Your blog reflects the reasons cited in the episode.

    1. Just looked “Seinfeild” up – I don’t watch TV – but can well image that many others have had experiences such as mine – TY for reading and commenting. Just popped over to your blog and have followed u – that’s rare 😉 look forward to catching up with some of your posts

  10. Oh I’m so with you on the wanting them to come thing May! And having their load on me, rather than in me, oh the joys, happy spunky joy x

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