Labels are meant to tell us something. Define or describe. Well, in the main I don’t like being labelled. Labels can be inaccurate or restrictive. Two reasons I try not to use them. But sometimes, I suppose, they can’t be avoided.
What I mean is I am dyslexic. That term is often used as a label to refer to certain writing and reading disorders. Because I do write – a lot – I occasionally find I have to actually tip a few people off that this is actually a problem I have. My problem, but one that others may need to be aware of. Particularly when I get called out on twitter for malapropism.
So lets look at labels. Labels for you and labels for me 😉
Labels ~ love em or hate em
One of the reasons I don’t like labels. Have I mentioned that before? That I don’t like labels? Well I don’t. Is because others can just come along with a large sticky one and slap in on your breast, just above your left nipple. The writing red and bold. And it is a lie. Inaccurate. Born out of ignorance or simply lack of knowledge. I have had a few of them literally thrown at me. Hard to peel off as they are sticky as hell.
What about general labels? If someone saw me and we spoke for say five minutes they may go away and get their marker pen out ready to write – Cis, White, Het without even consulting me. Meaning from my persona they think I identify with the gender of my birth. I am Caucasian and heterosexual. But would that label be true?
Labels can be spurious
The first bit is good. Cis. I do identify with being female and I was born a girl. But I don’t see myself as white and would not consider my self totally Het.
I have mixed blood – Indian, Mexican and a Nordic man that the sailed the seven seas. As far as attraction is concerned it will always be the person for me. The individual. Over any other aspect, every time.
But the main thing is I don’t think about these things. Not an issue. It may be someone else’s issue. But I am just me. Whether you stick the Cis, White, Het label on me OR the Cis, mixed, uncertain(does that exist?) – I am still the same person – But to others, these different labels show two diverse people, as labels are not only ambiguous they are often used as privilege markers too. People have a tendency to judge and only see the label they want to see.
This is where I think labels work best. If for various reasons you feel the need to belong. To be part of a group with a similar belief system, characteristics or lifestyle as you. I can see how this would benefit the people using the label. Personally, I have never really felt a strong need to be in a group. But I do appreciate sometimes it can get cold on the outside. And people on the outside need to beware of stereotyping members on the inside.
Sexually I would be labelled?
Sexually, I would be seen as a submissive brat. That’s OK, you could describe me as both those things. I’m not a lifestyle submissive. I’ve thought that maybe I could venture into that realm, but apart from dodging labels I have been focusing a lot on trust recently in all aspects of a person’s life, history and relationship. You will read more from me about that soon. So as far a taking up the mantle of a lifestyle submissive, I think I would be hindered from complying by the fact I struggle with trust.
A label I have been given and agree with is that of Witch 😉 – but even this has connotations – burn the Witch, Witch hunt and so forth…
So concluding – I want to be labelled with love, not hate…