Cock-a-doodle do I want a relationship with you

relationship

Being in a relationship should be an enjoyable part of life. Not always easy but hopefully rewarding. The more you put in the more you get out. Well, that should stand true but as people are human with individual agendas and morals we may sometimes be disappointed.

So please excuse the jaunty title, I couldn’t resist it. But this is a serious post about relationships.

I do love a good cock

The way certain creatures behave can teach humans a thing or two. One of my favourite animals are chickens. In my line of work, I come across quite a few and enjoy watching them. A particular cockerel impressed me a few months ago. He had four hens to take care off and he took his responsibilities very seriously. In the mornings he would cheerfully raise the alarm to signal a new day had begun. He made sure he fucked each of them regularly. If they decided to stray from their main patch he would check on them often. When he found any source of food he’d cluck loudly to get their attention and wait while they came running to feed first. Only then did he take his share.

relationship
In praise of the Cockerel

My observations made me think about relationship dynamics. Krystle looks into this in her recent post.

What is real love?

Truly loving someone should mean you want the best for them and their happiness is paramount. Sometimes to be happy a person may need more than just you in their life. Not an easy idea to come to terms with if your thoughts on this matter differ.

Past – My man and me

When I first met my man twenty one plus years ago, I wanted him. I knew that from the start. Another thing I was sure of was that he was a bit of a tart. He’d invest time in a steady relationship but played away on the side without the girlfriend knowing. Initially, I sensed this was the case and as we confided in each other he told me details.

During the time we became close I was also seeing a few men casually but would have considered giving them up for him. Instead, I played cleverly. Told him about the other guys. He reciprocated and was truthful regarding the way he behaved. I was happy about the honesty we were sharing. He wanted to see me but not pretending I was the only one.

We both enjoyed our dates together but this type of relationship was not fundamentally me. Knowing that as time went on I would just need him, I had already sent the other guys packing, there was no choice but to move on. Because of personal circumstances leading up to meeting him, I was quite vulnerable and knew I would not cope well with an open relationship. My heart didn’t want the pain.

Present – My man and me

He then got together with a woman who became his long-term partner, carrying on as before – dishonestly seeing others every now and then for sex. Five years ago, when we resumed our relationship, he explained that he had really wanted to be faithful and/or honest with her but the sexual chemistry between them was not strong and he thought she probably suspected but went with the premise – what you don’t know can’t hurt you.

So, now together we are in a monogamous relationship and have made a vow to be open and honest with each other regarding our sexual needs. I sometimes broach the conversation as to whether he would like an additional someone. He says he is too old, telling me that if I did then he would hope I’d talk with him first. At this point we are content with being monogamous, but I think the communication between us helps cement that, knowing other options are not necessarily eternally forbidden. The forbidden fruit is very powerful.

Fantasy

The funny thing is when we are having sex I often fantasise he has another woman sucking his cock, or he is fucking someone else in the arse. This really turns me on. He has also confessed having similar fantasies where one man is fucking me from behind while I am sucking another guys cock. At this time I don’t think I want mine to be brought to life. I still feel we need to nurture our own relationship. Miss Scarlett helped fulfil her partner’s fantasy and I certainly would not rule it out – but first I would want to feel more secure with the dynamics we have created between us.

What can be greater than letting the one you love receive pleasure? But of course if as a couple you go down that route then there is always the chance that more than sex could be on the cards, what about love?

Having thought about this for some time I am reasonably certain I would not cope well if this happened. Sex is one thing, falling in love another. But I know some people who can and do…

A relationship with Three Sides

I had been entering the various meme’s for a short while when I realised that a twitter friend of mine, the gorgeous Cara, was involved in a long distance, online relationship with Michael. Now I knew of Michael because he is married to the dynamic Molly from Sinful Sunday (and so many other things).

It was then that my fascination began.

It was obvious that Molly and Michael were/are deeply in love. This intrigued me and lead me to read their posts about the relationship between the three of them.

Cara came to England staying with Michael and Molly – soon becoming clear that Michael and Cara were falling in love.

Now at this point, I knew if I had been in Molly’s shoes, well I expect her feet are smaller than mine, but metaphorically speaking, then I would have been concerned that loving someone else would mean I may lose my man. Supposing he loved her more than me! But I think I am quite inadequate where relationships are concerned. I never really seem to fair too well with them. My current one is the strongest yet. But, I would still feel jealous and insecure if he wanted sex with another, let alone loved her too. Molly is clearly an extremely evolved individual who can see past her own needs and views the bigger picture clearly.

And he cooks!

At Eroticon I met the three of them. Immediately struck by their intelligence. Many times I had previously said how Michael is an extremely lucky guy to have them both. Don’t get me wrong that still stands but he’s also a genuinely great guy himself. Similar to the cockerel I talked about at the beginning of this post – joyously starting their days, taking care of their needs, be it sexually or emotionally. Not to mention feeding them!

They really seem to be involved in something special, making it work and happy.

As to me – well perhaps I still have some emotional growing up to do.

relationship
Relationship Dynamics – Masturbation Monday #201

playplay Previous post Play Me on Sinful Sunday
west endwest end Next post The Curse. Part Five ~ West End Girls

13 thoughts on “Cock-a-doodle do I want a relationship with you

  1. I love reading about all the ways we part-take in relationships. I too love the honesty that I share with a partner when we are seeing other ppl. I enjoy hearing the stories among other things.

  2. I am available for any exploration of the poly/3way fantasies you and your man desire.
    I’m sure you’ll have many other fans also wanting ‘in’ when you’re ready!
    ???

  3. As Cara said it is most definitely about the people. Cara fits into our life perfectly and speaking from experience that is a very difficult thing to find but not impossible as we have proven

    Mollyx

  4. I used to think I couldn’t handle an open relationship or anything not monogamous, until John Brownstone. For us, it’s about the love and trust we have in one another. But like Cara said, all the components have to be just right, too.

    Love this post! And I love how past you knew who were dealing with and kept your expectations realistic with him.

  5. I knew what you were pulling with that title, May! I do always love to read what is on your mind. Threesomes are a lot of fun when partners are committed, and only if. Of course, threesomes are fantastic when there are now strings attached.

  6. I feel much as you do. Theoretically, it all makes sense, and I know my man would love for me to be open to this. Even after 12 years of marriage , the thought of him falling in love with someone else, even while still being in love with me, terrifies me. But maybe I am insecure and controlling.

    1. or as Cara says maybe we have not met the person who could fit in with the dynamic of our relationships? 😉

  7. I think a situation like ours, the components have to be just right. I don’t know if I could do this with someone else in the dynamic. It all just works. Perhaps you’ll find the third it would work with also.

  8. Great post May – thought provoking. I enjoyed Krystle’s too. Poly is quite a different mindset for me but I’m open to trying to understand it!

Comments welcome

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Follow on Twitter

Get an email when I post

Recent on Sex Matters

%d bloggers like this: